I was reading one of my favorite online magazine’s clutchmagazine.com while, sitting at my new cozy starbucks I plan to frequent, as my castle of solitude from the craziness of the world, and I came across this particular article written about “5 Rewarding Trips Every Single Black Woman Should Take.”
I got to thinking about the many conversations I’ve had with my sister friends (because these ladies are beyond just friends to me, their my unbiological sisters) and I can recall some of our pervious conversations, about being able to go where you want to go because it’s just you. I thought back to my recent get up and go vacation I just had taken and how I’ve heard some of them say, that I should take the time out to enjoy and appreciate being able to do things like that, because after all, I really only have me to depend on with no obligations but to myself.
While on my vacation away from my familiar surroundings, I got to thinking about how being thirty-two with no kids and no husband that there should be in no way, shape, form or fashion that I shouldn’t be exactly where I want to be in my life. So I asked the presumptuous question of myself…just because I have no major obligations (i.e. kids, husband) am I truly deemed more fortunate to be able to live my life with no obligations to anyone but myself. With my finger tapping on my bottom lip in deep thought, I said to myself, if I choose to move out of state I can, if I choose to quit my job and start my own business I can, and the reasons behind my decision won’t hinder or hurt anyone but me or it can benefit me because after all my obligations are solely to me. In some shrewd light it comes off as being selfish, but then again, it’s just YOU so how else could it appear? Could it be for those who choose to not have any personal obligations (husband/wife/kids) are somehow we less fulfilled than, those who have someone to share their lives with?
Take the movie Eat, Pray, Love for instance, in the movie Liz who is played by Julia Roberts is being walked inside the airport by her best friend, and her friend starts to cry and tells Liz, the reason why she told her that she was crazy to go off and live in another country for a year, because if she had no husband and or baby she wanted to get away with her too. In watching the film I wondered Julia Roberts was unfilled in her life the way it was and someone for a moment her friend wanted to life a part of her life, that she use to be able to have.
With the weight of the world, weighing heavy on all of us, single, married, divorced with or without children, it’s hard not to think about what you’re life would be like IF THIS. No matter how your life pan’s out you can’t control the cards that were dealt to you, but you can learn how to play the game and be good at it. I’m not certain about all things, but what I am certain about in my journey is this, settling for anything and anyone doesn’t make you happy, it just makes you bitter and unhappy on the inside. The shell you wear on the outside will eventually begin to crack and break and your unhappiness will soon, be seen by the world you work so hard at not showing who you really are.
Trying to emulate what your friends have in their lives, will only lead to great disaster for you, because what’s for them is what’s for them, and what’s for you will soon come to you, you just have to be patient and wait on it. Until then, take the time to enjoy YOUR life while focusing on the things that are important to you and prepare to embark on your journey that will guide you to be where you know you should be. Everything else, if you want it will come in due time, I don’t know the time or the date of exactly when it will take place, but if you speak into existence long enough and trust and believe that it will be, than it shall be. Everyone has a voice, and what your voice is and how you make it heard it truly up to you. Your voice is your word, speak and be hear.
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